[video]
ugh! i feel like i want to give up already. lately ive been stumbling through life. i cant seem to do anything right nor can i say anything right. im just really frustrated right now. i really like this one guy but again i said the wrong thing and now hes mad at me. we had our first fight already and we arent even in a relationship. apparently i was flirting with some other dude and he got mad but i didnt even know he didnt want me flirting with other dudes. i didnt even think i was flirting with that guy. he wasnt even cute to begin with. im just ready to give up already.
see yourself as garbage, and the flies will come. that means that if you see yourself as unworthy or if you think of yourself as no good, then thats what you’re going to get in return. what you are thinking is what people respond to. those are the people that you are attracting. so to turn this around, you need to change you’re tune and stop spreading your misery. you need to look for the positives inside you and to magnify those things with appreciation. once you do that, then that is when you need to spread that vibe. thats when you attract the good. “to love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.”-oscar wilde; when you love yourself, thats when you automatically attract feelings of love for others around you.
no makeup=pure beauty
im not smiling. im just simply frowning upside down.
Sitting here crying
All confused and not knowing what to do
I know what’s right but something pulls me in
I don’t know what
My heart is torn
Wrong or right
Knowing what the right thing to do is
There’s doubt
That doubt hovers over you
Like a dark gray cloud just waiting to explode
Drenched in tears
Still confused
What should I do?
Should I end the misery? Is it worth trying?
The more I lie to myself,
The more damage I do.
Decisions must be made
Good, clear, true decisions
No turning back
Torn
as i sit in my room
looking out the window
watching kids playing and be free
i sit there and think
i think about my reality
the reality that doesnt shed light
i wonder
is there a way to escape?
as i sit there, wondering
i imagine what i would feel
if i were to be free like those kids
smiling, laughing, enjoying
those days are gone
i have entered the real world
where smiling, laughing, and enjoying
would be a miracle
i’m trapped in this reality
no where to go
thinking of ways to get out
but nothing
im incomplete without you
complete meant being with you
as our relationship grew
so did my heart
after awhile, things got out of control
my heart starts to crack
strength was no longer there
distance was growing bigger
my heart shatters into pieces
as if winter was over
and the frozen ice cracked
our relationship was a mess
and so am i
i’m dead
i died
a gunshot was heard
blood everywhere
sad music
playing at my funeral
people crying
blessed
the grave
my family
my friends
everyone praying
flying like an angel
watching
over you
you’ll be safe